It is in the process of embracing our imperfections that we find our truest gifts: courage, compassion, and connection.
—Brené Brown
Father Richard shares how the teachings of the 19th-century French nun Thérèse of Lisieux have supported his own spiritual journey:
Thérèse humbly trusted her own experience and taught the spirituality of imperfection which was so radical in her time (and our own). Thérèse may be one of my favorite saints because I tend to be a perfectionist. In the popular personality typing system known as the Enneagram, I’m a Type One. [1] The trap for the One is the ideal of perfectionism (for which we are responsible). This makes us dissatisfied and disappointed by nearly everything, starting with ourselves.
Thérèse has helped me to embrace my own imperfection and that of others. When her sister Céline was saddened by her own faults, Thérèse advised her to seek peace even when she felt displeasing to herself as she “hits against the stones in the night.” [2] If we pay attention even for an hour, we observe how hard it is to be “displeasing” to ourselves! To resolve this problem, Thérèse teaches us to let go of the very need to “think well of ourselves” to begin with! That’s our ego talking, not God. [3]
Worthiness is not the issue; the issue is trust and surrender. As Thérèse understood, “Jesus does not demand great actions from us but simply surrender and gratitude.” [4] Let’s resolve this once and for all: You’re not worthy! None of us are. That worthiness road is a game of denial and pretend. We’re all saved by grace. We’re all being loved in spite of ourselves. That’s why I can also say, “You’re all worthy!” But your worthiness has nothing to do with you, and everything to do with the goodness of God. [5]
Author Dr. Brené Brown teaches about the gifts that come with embracing our imperfection:
When we can let go of what other people think and own our story, we gain access to our worthiness—the feeling that we are enough just as we are and that we are worthy of love and belonging. When we spend a lifetime trying to distance ourselves from the parts of our lives that don’t fit with who we think we’re supposed to be, we stand outside of our story and hustle for our worthiness by constantly performing, perfecting, pleasing, and proving….
There is a line from Leonard Cohen’s song “Anthem” that serves as a reminder to me when … I’m trying to control everything and make it perfect. The line is, “There is a crack in everything. That’s how the light gets in.”… This line helps me remember the beauty of the cracks (and the messy house and the imperfect manuscript and the too-tight jeans). It reminds me that our imperfections are not inadequacies; they are reminders that we’re all in this together. Imperfectly, but together. [6]
References:
[1] For a description of the origins and uses of the Enneagram from Richard Rohr’s perspective, see “Knowing Ourselves,” Daily Meditation, April 24, 2016.
[2] See Thérèse to Sister Geneviève (Céline), December 24, 1896, in Thérèse of Lisieux: General Correspondence, vol. 2, 1890–1897, trans. John Clarke (ICS Publications, 1988), 1038.
[3] Adapted from Richard Rohr, Eager to Love: The Alternative Way of Francis of Assisi (Franciscan Media, 2024), 114.
[4] Story of a Soul: The Autobiography of St. Thérèse of Lisieux, trans. John Clarke, 2nd ed. (ICS Publications, 1976), 188.
[5] Adapted from Richard Rohr, The Authority of Those Who Have Suffered (Center for Action and Contemplation, 2005). Available as MP3 audio download.
[6] Brené Brown, The Gifts of Imperfection, 10th anniv. ed. (Random House, 2020), 32–33, 82–83.
Image credit and inspiration: Martin Baron, untitled (detail), 2025, photo, Unsplash. Click here to enlarge image. We are gentle with ourselves, broken bits and all, trusting that all of ourselves is worthy.
Story from Our Community:
I am a Methodist preacher and have been following CAC materials for several years now. The Daily Meditations are the highlight of my day. I am particularly moved by meditations that encourage us to embrace our own imperfection and still remember that we are beloved children of God. I have struggled with perfectionism all my life but now have written a new mantra for myself: “Consent to be imperfect and yet precious; consent to weep and dance and hurt and grow.”
—Joanna T.
