Perfectionism: The Enemy of Goodness and Grace

The greatest enemy of ordinary daily goodness and joy is not imperfection, but the demand for some supposed perfection.
—Richard Rohr, Eager to Love 

Richard Rohr discovered the writings of Saint Thérèse of Lisieux (1873–1897) during his first year as a Franciscan. Richard describes Thérèse’s teaching as “a spirituality of imperfection”:  

Thérèse of Lisieux was a French Carmelite nun with minimal formal education, who in her short, hidden life of only twenty-four years captured the essence of Jesus’ core teachings on love. Thérèse was declared a Doctor of the Church, which means her teaching is seen as thoroughly reliable and trustworthy. She “democratized holiness,” as Brother Joseph Schmidt said, “making it clear that holiness is within the reach of anyone willing to do God’s will in love at each successive moment as life unfolds.” [1]  

Thérèse came into a nineteenth-century Catholic Church that often believed in an angry, punitive God, perfectionism, and validation by personal good behavior—which is a very unstable and illusory path. In the midst of this rigid environment, Thérèse was convinced that her message, taught to her by Jesus himself, was “totally new.” [2] The gospel of radical grace had been forgotten by many Christians so much so that Thérèse had to call it “new.” 

Thérèse called this simple, childlike path her “little way.” It is a spirituality of imperfection. In a letter to priest Adolphe Roulland, she writes: “Perfection seems simple to me, I see it is sufficient to recognize one’s nothingness and to abandon oneself as a child into God’s arms.” [3] Any Christian “perfection” is, in fact, our ability to include, forgive, and accept our imperfection. As I’ve often said, we grow spiritually much more by doing it wrong than by doing it right. That might just be the central lesson of how spiritual growth happens, though nothing in us wants to believe it.  

If there is such a thing as human perfection, it seems to emerge precisely from how we handle the imperfection that is everywhere, especially in ourselves. What a clever place for God to hide holiness, so that only the humble, “little,” and earnest will find it! A “perfect” person ends up being one who can consciously forgive and include imperfection rather than the ones who think they are totally above and beyond imperfection. It becomes rather obvious once we say it out loud.

Near the end of her life, Thérèse explained her little way to her sister, and this became part of her autobiography Story of a Soul. In contrast to the “big way” of heroic perfectionism, she teaches, in essence, that as a little one “with all [her] imperfections,” God’s love is drawn toward her. God has to love her and help her because she is “too small to climb the rough stairway of perfection.” [4] With utter confidence, she “believed herself infinitely loved by Infinite Love.” [5]  

References: 
[1] Joseph F. Schmidt, Walking the Little Way of Thérèse of Lisieux: Discovering the Path of Love (The Word Among Us Press, 2012), 22. 

[2] Story of a Soul: The Autobiography of St. Thérèse of Lisieux, trans. John Clarke, 2nd ed. (ICS Publications, 1976), 207. 

[3] Thérèse to Adolphe Roulland, May 9, 1897, in Thérèse of Lisieux: General Correspondence, vol. 2, 1890–1897, trans. John Clarke (ICS Publications, 1988), 1094. 

[4] Story of a Soul, 207. 

[5] Père Liagre, A Retreat with St. Thérèse, trans. P. J. Owen (Little Way Association, 1947), 22. Note: This is the book that Father Richard read during his novitiate year. 

Adapted from Richard Rohr, Falling Upward: A Spirituality for the Two Halves of Life, rev. ed. (Jossey-Bass, 2024), xx; and “Discovering the Little Way,” Daily Meditations, September 25, 2022. 

Image credit and inspiration: Martin Baron, untitled (detail), 2025, photo, Unsplash. Click here to enlarge image. We are gentle with ourselves, broken bits and all, trusting that all of ourselves is worthy. 

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