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Center for Action and Contemplation
Recognizing Our Biases
Recognizing Our Biases

Overcoming a Fear of the Other

Friday, November 21, 2025

The more we bump into the folks who are so-called “other,” the more we are stretched and the more we are pulled out of bias. We have new truths, because we have tangible evidence of the beautiful, powerful creativity of our God who made all of this diversity for us to enjoy.  
—Jacqui Lewis, Learning How to See  

Brian McLaren writes that Jesus’ model of acceptance, inclusion, and love for “the other” can help us overcome and heal our biases, particularly “contact bias.”  

When I don’t have intense and sustained personal contact with “the other,” my prejudices and false assumptions go unchallenged. Think of the child who is told by people he trusts that people of another race, religion, culture, sexual orientation, or class are dirty and dangerous. 

You can immediately see the self-reinforcing cycle: those people are dirty or dangerous, so I will distrust and avoid them, which means I will never have sustained and respectful interactive contact with them, which means I will never discover that they are actually wonderful people to be around. 

In this way, the prejudice cycle spins on, unchallenged across generations. As prejudice persists, it becomes embedded in cultures and institutions, creating systems of racism and hatred, marginalizing groups who are stigmatized, dehumanized, scapegoated, exploited, oppressed, or even killed. [1]  

I especially love the way Jesus challenges contact bias. Jesus reached out to the other at the table and put the other in the spotlight by giving the other a voice. On page after page of the Gospels, Jesus doesn’t dominate the other, or avoid the other…. Instead, he incarnates into the other, joins the other in solidarity, protects the other, listens to the other, serves the other, and even lays down his life for the other…. In each case, he moves victims of scapegoating and exclusion from the margins to center stage so their voices are heard. [2] 

Rev. Dr. Jacqui Lewis leads what she describes as a “multi-everything” congregation in New York City. She views inclusion as central to the gospel call to love: 

The one we follow into mission and ministry—Jesus the Christ—was an avowed boundary crosser, a reformer of the religious and secular culture of his time. We are in good company when we lead the way on radical inclusion of those different from ourselves. In some contexts that might mean a black church reaching out to Korean neighbors, a Latino congregation starting a ministry to immigrant families from North Africa, or a Chinese church hosting an afterschool program for African American junior high students…. We believe the commitment to inclusion and diversity is a high calling, issued to all who count themselves as Christians, no matter what our ethnicity or culture. [3] 

References: 
[1] Brian McLaren, Why Don’t They Get It? Overcoming Bias in Others (and Yourself), rev. ed. (Self-published, 2019, 2024), 41–42, e-book.  

[2] McLaren, Why Don’t They Get It?, 91–92. 

[3] Jacqueline J. Lewis and John Janka, The Pentecost Paradigm: Ten Strategies for Becoming a Multiracial Congregation (Westminster John Knox Press, 2018), 8. 

Image credit and inspiration: Bud Helisson, untitled (detail), 2021, photo, Brazil, Unsplash. Click here to enlarge image. The lenses symbolize how our inherent biases—like favoring what confirms what we already believe or seeing only those like ourselves—can cloud our vision, reminding us that true clarity comes from looking again and being willing to see differently. 

Story from Our Community:  

Fear has a firm grip on our world, and many artfully use that fear as a weapon. Divisiveness and violence flow through its wake, and we suffer in the chaos. Love, on the other hand, counters that chaos. As difficult as it is sometimes, I remind myself to be that love. Somehow, the micro-choices I make matter. Despite the constant flow of drama, chaos, and confusion, we can be a channel of peace. It heals the brokenness through a hidden wholeness of kindness and love.  
—Terry L. 

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