The Journey to Spiritual Maturity
What are your experiences of growing in age and wisdom? Members of our contemplative community share insights, stories, and moments of stillness from their personal journeys. From finding new joy in the familiar aspects of our lives to surviving life’s challenges, we hope you find comfort and inspiration in these stories from fellow travelers on the contemplative path.
Finding New Energy and Reverence for Familiar Things
Scott M. reflects on the unexpected insights that can surprise us as we examine long-held beliefs: “As a healthcare marketer, I have never understood why some people desperately cling to life. Maybe it’s because I work in an industry where I am used to seeing reality of death.
Recently, I’ve been reflecting that maybe this perspective has been a result of repressing a deep grief from what I have witnessed in my professional life, including the Covid-19 pandemic. One morning, as I was sitting in silence around 5 am, a thought passed through my awareness: The frailty of life reveals itself as sacredness.
It offered me a new perspective. Just now, in my second half of life, I learning to see and experience the deep sacredness of life.”
“Just now, in my second half of life, I learning to see and experience the deep sacredness of life.” —Scott M.
Embracing Spiritual Maturity with Truth and Honesty
John F. finds a new energy for the small things after emerging from a battle with depression: “My first half of life, or the ‘survival dance,’ was highly successful by all external measures. But internally, I battled depression for many years.
Recently, though, in my second half of life I have been gifted a glimpse of the joy of wholeness. I still work, I pay bills, I have relationships with friends and family. But now, I feel a sense of mission. I forgive easily and feel genuine contrition when I hurt others. Mostly, I just dance.
Alone in the kitchen, almost always with music on, I find my middle-aged self-dancing and thinking What a sight I must be in the eyes of God! I think he is smiling, as if watching a precious 4-year-old dancing.”
“Alone in the kitchen, almost always with music on, I find my middle-aged self-dancing and thinking What a sight I must be in the eyes of God!” —John F.
Finding Light Through Loss in Second Half of Life
Kay S. describes how her newfound solitary life has brought her a new sense of communion and peace: “I live by the sea alone with my cat. I live with God and God lives with me. I have known motherhood. I have known Love. I have experienced a full career as a social worker.
Only in my second life have I know the sweetness of Jesus in such a mystical way. In the pain of the loss of my marriage, my children, and my struggle with addiction, I have been able to slip away like John of the Cross and be with Jesus. It is through loss that I have crept through the crack into a place of light.
The sea now carries me when I swim, and I have become another wave in the sea. I live in a place in a place of music, plants, art, and silence for these are the gateways of heaven.”
“In the pain of the loss of my marriage, my children, and my struggle with addiction, I have been able to slip away like John of the Cross and be with Jesus.” —Kay S.
Beginning the True Journey to Spiritual Maturity
Brian F. describes the hard reckoning that set him on his journey towards greater honesty and discovering his true self: “Up until 2 years ago, I spent my life as part of the traditional hierarchy. I pursued education, achievement, advancement, a military career, and served actively as a lay leader in the local church. I also struggled with darkness in my life.
When the darkness I had been struggling with was brought into the light two years ago, my true journey began—the journey into the second half. Through contemplative teachings, I am learning how to bring my authentic self to various contexts of my life.
I see my experience of God is becoming real, personal, intimate. Contemplation has expanded my capacity to love others. My soul is beginning to settle. I’m discovering what I sense is my True Self showing up to walk in its purpose.”
“My experience of God is becoming real, personal, intimate. My soul is beginning to settle.” —Brian F.
Embracing Painful Opportunities for Spiritual Maturity
Tom M. reflects on how he found comfort after a cancer diagnosis: “I was already struggling with significant spinal pain when I was diagnosed with Prostate cancer. This led me to a different, deeper prayer life and spiritual focus.
I find myself needing to surrender deeper, and there is a greater sense of dying to self than I have ever known. I try to let myself go to the care of a loving God, in Christ, but this can be hard since I live with chronic pain. I am not happy with the pain, but I welcome the opportunity to grow closer to God.”
“I am not happy with the [chronic] pain, but I welcome the opportunity to grow closer to God.” —Tom M.
Leaving Behind the Unessential in the Second Half
Teri D. remembers how her spiritual life evolved after her divorce: “When my husband left me with five children to raise alone, a man who sat behind us at church said, not them — they’re the perfect family. Looking back, his comment only shows one thing: how good I was at making sure that everything looked OK from the outside.
The divorce marked the beginning of a very long period of disorder in my life. Contemplative teachings have helped me strip away the unessential to identify my True Self and my false self. Today, I can honestly say that I am grateful for the disorder and the reorder that is taking place.
It has not been an easy journey. It has been a necessary process for me to find what I was created for: living from my True Self.”
“The divorce marked the beginning of a very long period of disorder in my life. Contemplative teachings have helped me strip away the unessential to identify my True Self and my false self.” —Teri D.
Reflect with Us
What aspects of your life do you see in these stories? What were the moments in your life that invited in a shift in perspective? Share your reflection with us.
We Conspire is a series from the Center for Action and Contemplation featuring wisdom and stories from the growing Christian contemplative movement. Sign up for the monthly email series and receive a free invitation to practice each month.